You're a Better Speaker than You Think

July 2021

Preface

I have the pleasure of co-hosting a charming, virtual Meetup every week. Each participant is gifted with a random topic and then asked to respond within 60 seconds. What began as a quirky experiment on Zoom has grown into a thriving and beloved event.

Our attendees can’t get enough of these gatherings, and it’s easy to see why. It’s an opportunity to connect with new people, explore shared experiences, and promote personal growth. At the end of each session, they leave feeling invigorated, cherished, and supported.

We sprinkle in a dash of friendly competition, asking everyone to vote for the speech that resonated with them the most. We keep a tally of the winners and the votes received, adding a layer of exhilarating anticipation to our meetings.

Authenticity & Vulnerability Speak Louder Than Words

As we’ve progressed, some fascinating observations have emerged:

Often, the poll results show no outright winner. Instead, the authenticity of the speaker’s narrative and the voters’ personal preferences or experiences tend to sway the outcome. The most articulate, traditionally eloquent speakers don’t always garner more favor than others.

Vulnerability, it turns out, truly resonates. On rare occasions, under the pressure of time, a speaker might struggle to find the perfect story for their topic. Such was the case last week when one attendee was asked to recount “her worst date”. For a few moments, she appeared lost in thought, her mind clearly racing to recall a fitting anecdote. Despite the pause, her earnest attempt to find an answer, her genuine expressions, and lively hand gestures left everyone smiling. In an evening filled with stellar speeches, her candid reflection on “my worst date” won the poll for resonating most with the audience.

The Path to Confidence: Safety, Diversity, and Repetition

Many are daunted by public speaking, envisioning an unattainable ideal of the perfect orator. They place an enormous burden on themselves to speak flawlessly and eloquently. Amidst this pressure, they forget to be present and connect authentically with the audience. I wish they knew that what truly matters to listeners is an original and intriguing story, told with authenticity and presence.

To grow more confident in impromptu speaking, there are two critical elements: a safe, diverse audience and repeated exposure. Genuine, constructive feedback from listeners not only encourages and motivates speakers, but also offers valuable insights for growth and improvement.

As our weekly Meetup demonstrates, it’s not just about crafting the perfect speech—it’s about speaking from the heart. So the next time you’re asked to speak, remember: it’s your authenticity and vulnerability that will truly resonate with your audience.